NICU Dads: An Advocate and Support System

NICU Dads

While I often talk about the struggle we have as premature and NICU moms, there is another person who is a big part of this journey. NICU dads play such an important role that is sometimes overlooked.

Even though it is not their body, watching the mother of your child go through pain, both physical and mental, is excruciating. Not being able to do anything to stop a pregnancy from having complications or your baby from coming early is just as heartbreaking for the father.

Then, they must also watch their baby fight their way through the NICU.

As you’ll read today, NICU dads can play a very important role. They can serve as a source of strength, and also as an advocate.

While it wasn’t easy, it helped to talk to my husband when we made decisions during my pregnancy,and during the twins’ NICU stay. When I got very emotional about things, it helped to have him there to listen.

Today, you’ll meet one of those amazing NICU dads. He helped his wife fight and get the care they all needed.

Please meet Tyberius, as told by his mom, Ashley.

Tyberius

1. Tell us about your baby.

2. How long was your NICU stay? What was the hardest part?

Ty spent exactly 100 days in the NICU at CHKD Norfolk.

The absolute hardest part was not being able to be there with him all the time. We visited usually every other day, but we had 5 kids at home and a limited support system. So, it was a lot of juggling and limited time with him.

3. Do you know what caused your premature birth?

4. How are you and your baby doing now?

Ty is now 4 months old. He has been home for almost a month. Ty is still followed by a lot of doctors.

His eyes are behind and he still has stage 1 ROP.  We see an eye doctor every 2 weeks. His first pulmonology appointment is this week, as he still has RDS (Respiratory Distress Syndrome,) and pulmonary hypoplasia (incomplete development of the lungs).

Ty will see cardiology soon, has his first NICU grad clinic appointment this week and is being closely followed by peds due to slow weight gain. He will have a head and spinal ultrasound, a repeat newborn screening, and synagis soon.

Ty now weighs 7 lbs 6.7 ozs and is 19.5inches long. He is on track for his adjusted age, but obviously behind on his actual age.

The rest of the family is adjusting slowly.

It’s been a very stressful 9 months for all of us. Things change a lot in our house very quickly.

5. What advice do you have for other preemie parents?

My best advice is either be your kids advocate or find a strong one to help.

My husband was ours. He pushed for things a lot harder than I did and stood up for things better than I could.

Hold your baby as much as you can. Always know that faith, hope, prayers and good thoughts can be just as healing as physical medicine.